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A couple of weeks ago, in his River City Press column Rana Reckons, Rana Waitai reckoned that the appointment of Hamish McDoull as Labour candidate for Whanganui was done and dusted.

Right on Rana. Your column is always full of solid common sense and that’s a refreshing change – the only thing common about common sense is how uncommon it is.

Who had a say in this? The local Labour Party membership? The beloved leader and her minders? I suspect a divine decree from the Czarina herself but I’m willing to be persuaded otherwise.

Did Jill Pettis stand down or was she pushed? Did she “voluntarily” stand down before she was given the old heave-ho?

Good luck Hamish. But keep your powder dry. There’s no internal democracy in your party of choice.

Published this morning in New Zealand Matters

Mallard Reducks

I live in hope, but I forgot the rules.

Nobody ever got rich underestimating a politician’s capacity for cynical disregard of the electorate or that electorate’s ability to forget the politicians’ abuse of their trust.

I’m not a Labour supporter, mainly because I can’t abide the Czarina’s demeanor of superiority, her status as minister for everything and her hijacking of every kindergarten fence painting for a photo op. I respect her intellectual ability and her political skills but the person who sneeringly talks down to me from the evening news will (probably) never get my vote.

However, I believe that in many ways they’ve been a good government, ably abetted in retaining the reins by National’s continual ability to shoot itself in both feet at any given opportunity.

Trevor Mallard has been an effective minister, albeit occasionally erratic. Our government would be the poorer without him. And he seems a nice bloke.

Nevertheless, what he did was not acceptable. He should have walked the plank and awaited redemption (à la Ruth Dyson) until the next government or opposition is formed.

He still has his $250,000 salary (my guess), the ministerial car and the perks. He’s been demoted 3 places to the second bench but with a wink, wink, nudge, nudge has been given a virtual promotion with the redistribution of portfolios.

It’s not right.

I spent 20 years in the Royal New Zealand Navy. For the last 5 of those years I was a commissioned officer. If, while holding that commision or the Queen’s Warrant which preceded it, I had done what Trevor did, I’d have been court-martialled, lost my commission and been discharged from the navy.

Not so those who would have been my employers.

What sort of an outfit is this?

Rana Waitai’s column in last week’s River City Press was interesting reading. Rana has always seemed to me to be a man with his head screwed on and his down-to-earth observations on his new positions in council and the Hospital Board are a sign of hope that my vote for him wasn’t wasted.

I was tempted to say, “Hardly surprising when you consider his background,” but, sadly, a few of his erstwhile senior colleagues in the Police Force give the lie to that assumption.

Rana also wrote about the reduced vote count for Vision candidates in the election which brought him into Council.

There seems to be a feeling about, expressed often and with some vituperation by Rob Vinsen (who never misses an opportunity to put the boot into Vision whether it’s deserved or not), that the Vision team were given a thumping of Rugby World Cup proportions in the election.

Well, the fact is most people seem to have voted the way I did, giving an increased vote for Mayor Michael – despite his propensity for pit bull tactics – and pulling back a bit on Vision.

We had our way for good or ill – as happens with elections. We have “get things done” Bulldozer Laws and we have a Vision team without a majority. but let’s keep things in perspective. The Vision team have only been reduced by one. Hardly a massacre.

Oh dear Trevor, what have you done this time?

Now in theory, there’s no argument. Our great and glorious leaders foisted the family violence legislation on us so that people would stop bashing their babies to death.

That worked, didn’t it?

Yeah, right.

You and I are paying big bikkies for ads on the box telling us that violence isn’t alright. Not ever.

So what do you think folks?

Is Is Rocky Mallard out for the count?

It’s a toughie for the Czarina. How many seasoned campaigners does she have on the front bench? How many lurking on the back benches who have the talents necessary to foot it in debate as well as Trevor?

Not a lot.

Dear me, what a quandary. Honour or expediency?

Helen’s admirable management skills and ruthless leadership will be sorely tested. If she lets him off with the wet bus ticket treatment will enough voters forget?

Probably.

So what next?

My guess is a stern talking to, demotion to twentyish in the cabinet rankings, and full redemption after the next election. Which, as Helen well knows, is far from lost.

But let’s not lose sight of what happened here. A senior cabinet minister indulged in a premeditated brawl. He didn’t invite the far from blameless Tau Henare outside to show him his stamp collection.

A person with the standards of integrity we should expect from our elected representatives should have had his resignation on Helen’s desk the nest morning.

A resignation tendered with bags packed, not a Clayton’s resignation offered tongue-in-cheek with a wink and a nudge.

Originally posted this morning in new zealand matters.

You never had it so good – well, not quite

During the current government’s regime the average earner may be earning a couple of hundred dollars a week more, but take home pay adjusted for inflation has only risen by $10 a week.

The dreaded “bracket creep” is to blame.

Labour says it just shows how important it is to keep inflation under control.

Yeah, right. If the inflation hadn’t had occurred you wouldn’t have got the pay rise and anyway as I stated above the figure is adjusted for inflation.

Welfare state to the rescue

There’s an exception. If the earner has children, the income redistributing Working for Families package will compensate – at the expense of those who don’t have kids and by turning most of the population into welfare beneficiaries.

If you didn’t know before where Michael Cullen’s whopping great surpluses come from, you do now.

Annette Main, not satisfied with a resounding victory in the race for Wanganui representatives on the Horizons Regional Council, has weighed into the distant second runner. See her comment below.

I understand your pain Ms Main, but this is what’s known as democracy. Perhaps you might have waited until the dust settled before summarily executing Mr Walker. It’s hardly a foundation for a working relationship to attack the man before the ink is dry on the voting papers.

There are people in Wanganui who feel that Horizons has exceeded its mandate on occasion and that they need to be reigned in.

That may be why Bob came in at #2 rather than trailing the field – not bad for someone with the severe handicap of being a known real estate agent.

If you wish to convert him to the cause, you’ve hardly started off on the right foot.

Ms Main thinks that Bob is entitled to his views about excessive rating and spending by the regional body but questions their veracity. Well, Annette, I hardly think you’ve chosen the best method of moderating Bob’s views.

Or mine.

“I would really have liked to be working along someone really positive,”

“I think this result is unfortunate for Wanganui. We needed two positive people there, people who wanted to see the best outcomes for Wanganui at that table.” Ms Main said, with apparently unconscious irony.

“It’s really sad I have to sit alongside someone who has made it clear he will be working against the council.

“It’s disappointing for me to have another Wanganui candidate who is negative about the role of the regional council. I would have far preferred to have seen someone there who I could have worked with.

“He’s talked up the figure of rate rises of 39 percent or something like that. But 39 percent of what? You’d need to have facts about how much people are paying on their Horizons rates and it’s certainly not the feedback I’m getting from people.

“I’m not getting people telling me they unhappy with what Horizons is spending.

“My Wanganui District Council rates have gone up 18 percent in the last three years and that’s a huge amount of money. But I’m not complaining about that because I know there is work to be done,”

First I decided that Michael had to go. He’s too cocky and obnoxious by far.

Then I had a rethink. He’s certainly got things done. Get rid of a few of his sycophants in the Vision team but put Michael back to stir the pot.

Yeah.

But that nice John Martin seemed to have some great qualities too. High flying international businessman - how does it go? A career in global corporate management - yeah, that’s it.

I was quite impressed. then I heard his mellifluous tones on a radio ad. He’s going to fix up Wonganewey. Wonga what?

You heard it. WongaNEWey. I just hate that pronunciation. I know a lot of old Wanganui folk use it and I can forgive them, even whilst gritting my teeth.

But I won’t have my mayor broadcasting it to the world on the 6 o’clock news. Sorry John, on yer bike.

Anyway, what does that mean - a career in global corporate management - factory manager for Mazda light bulbs? Chairman of Toyota? Postmaster General of Nauru.

Blow me down, I could write a better résumé than that!

Michael, it’s yours by default. Now start being just a tiny bit polite to people. Well, most of them. You can be rude to the Czarina in Helengrad, and George Dubbya Bush. Maybe even the NZRU. but lay off old ladies, shattered All Blacks and chocolate labs.

The Wanganui Chronicle deserves a few Brownie Points for holding the Mayoral Forum. Pity about the lack of interest.

I must not have been paying much attention. If I can get the Social Secretary off the crossword I read the Chronicle every day, but I hadn’t heard about this summit. Should have overshadowed APEC. (No George, it’s not OPEC, they’re your mates).

Obviously not alone in that – only 120 of our fellow citizens turned up.

The contenders

As everybody knows, there are only two contenders: Michael Laws and John Martin.

The ever hopeful Randhir Dahya has given stirling service to Wanganui, but he must a cheerleader for Michael’s Vision team, because all he’s going to accomplish is to split the anti-Michael vote.

Who knows what Russell Fleming and Chandra Osborne are trying to accomplish. A foot in the door for 2013?

Randhir’s obviously been keeping the punters happy, topping the poll for Councillor since the last ice age. So can anyone enlighten me as to why he’s a perennial loser in the race for the boss’s job?

So what came out of it all then?

Well, nothing new really. Everybody wants more facilities, less debt and no rates increases.

• Michael says he’s put the brake on rates.
  Debatable don’t you think? Oil on the brake pads methinks.
• Michael says he must continue with God’s work or we’ll drift into Armageddon.
  Maybe, maybe not.
• John says that the gang problem isn’t what it’s cracked up to be. Boy racers and Wanganui’s negative image are the problem.
  I’ll go along with that.
• Randhir’s concerned about debt.
  Me too.
• Russell wants eco-tourism and more sports facilities. Don’t we all? Private enterprise please.
  He also thinks that cheap houses and the city’s central location should attract new residents.
  Trouble is, if they come, the prices will rise. What is the city central to I hear you cry?
• Chandra didn’t bother to front.

Cheesy anecdote for the day

An old lady told John Martin:

Politicians are like baby’s nappies. They need to be changed regularly, and for the same reason.

Good one John. So if you get the job, you won’t outwear your welcome.

Right?

Our beloved Mayor Michael is nothing if not a polarizer. People love him or hate him.

Like many voters in the last election, I felt it was time for new blood. The prospect of a Vision council with a majority seemed to be a “good thing”. The mayor and his team would be able to get things done.

The Hibiscus Coast council imploded — divisions caused gridlock. Chaos ensued and central goverment intervened. Look at what’s happened in Auckland in the past when the mayor has been outnumbered and monstered by a bickering council.

Well, Michael and Vision got things done. They kept their promises – more effectively than 99% of politicians but not as closely as they’d like us to believe. To my chequebook, project surcharges and parking fee increases are rates increases by another name.

You can call your cat Fido, but he’s still a moggie.

Nevertheless, they’ve accomplished a lot. The boardwalk is an outstanding example. The Splash Centre extensions too – although I hope we can expect user pays on that hydroslide.

So, they’ve done good. What next?

Many feel that Michael has done God’s work but that it’s time for a rest from the politics of aggression and intimidation. and for a bit of co-operation.

The Vision team bear an uncanny resemblance to Czarina Helen’s ministers: what the head prefect says goes. There’s one person making the decisions and we all know who it is.

Supporters of Rob Muldoon and Maggie Thatcher will be suffering severe déjà vu.

I’m open to persuasion, but my feeling is that Wanganui folk are ready for some decorum and unity.

But will they get it?

John Martin is the only realistic alternative. Would he be able to generate consensus? How will he handle hostile Vision councillors, bereft of their beloved leader – assuming that there are some?

What about Randhir Dahya? Alleges that he was Chas Poynter’s great mate. Didn’t stop him from trying to pull off a coup evey time an election cam along. Will he cooperate with a political virgin?

Will long serving toilers like Barbara Bullock and Rangi Wills take kindly to an new mayor with no local body experience.

It’s a worry

I can’t make up my mind. Help me out Wanganui.